Many people recall that when I was running for State Representative, the Michigan Chamber endorsed another one of the candidates in the primary race. I know people remember because I still get asked about it. People were shocked and surprised, some were disappointed, and although I didn’t hear from anyone who felt happy about it, I’m sure there were some of those too. Initially I was crushed. I was in Madison, WI at the time for some chamber of commerce training when I received a phone call from an employee of the Michigan Chamber. He called to give me a heads up that the news release announcing endorsements would be sent within an hour or two. I couldn’t go back to class right away. I was in a state of disbelief which quickly turned to disappointed. I cried. I was angry. I had never felt that level of betrayal before. Eventually I got it together and went back to class, but I couldn’t pay much attention because I was still a swarm of emotions through much of that day.
Time heals all wounds, right? That was in June of this year and since that time I have definitely started thinking about the experience in a different way. I learned more about what happened, and the ugly politics that were at play. I lost complete respect for some people I had known for many years. It makes me sad to know that I was fooled by people I thought were better than putting the game of politics above doing what was right. I suppose that’s politics though. More importantly than that, I changed the way I think about the betrayal. Never in my life has it been clearer to me that the only things in life we really have control over are our own actions and responses. I had a choice of how to let that experience impact me. What happened was hugely embarrassing and depleting. It felt like I was being bullied. I had given more than a decade of my life to the chamber of commerce industry (Alpena and Mount Pleasant Chambers of Commerce), yet the State Chamber wouldn’t stand behind me. What did that say about my ability to be in this field? Amid my disappointment and anger and feelings of being betrayed, of course I was questioning my own abilities in the field. However, after some time to think about it and plenty of support from people I respect I realized that even though the Michigan Chamber turned its back on me, I still cared deeply about Alpena and I still cared deeply about Michigan. It didn’t mean I wasn’t qualified to be in the industry and it absolutely did not mean I had turned my back on my work. Their choice didn’t have to have an impact on my ability to continue to do what is right for the community and state that I have such passion for. The more I thought about it, the more I saw the big picture and realized I was going to be ok. My career was going to be ok, win or lose the election.
When life hands you lemons, make lemonade; look through the rain to see the rainbow; everything happens for a reason; the happiest people don’t necessarily have the best of everything, they just make the best of everything that comes their way; every day may not be good but there is something good in every day. Whichever over-used cliché you apply to experiences like these, the important thing to realize is that life is hard. Things will happen that throw you for a loop. Things will happen that hurt. But in the end, the way you respond to it and the way you let it shape you is what really matters. I couldn’t have impacted a choice that was made for reasons that I didn’t have control over. I can only use it remind and inspire me not to do the same to others because I know how terrible it feels. I can use it to motivate me to do even better for the community and state, if I choose.
Things happen every day that, plainly and simply put, suck. But these are really the things that can make life better. If we let them.