There is something that is impacting the way I feel about others and as much as I try to get to know a person for who they are and not make decisions about them too quickly or based on a small amount of information, it is becoming increasingly difficult when it comes to what I’m writing about.
So much is driving a wedge between people lately. Politics, race, religion, money, social status. It seems to be, in a big way, politically fueled. But for me, those things do not matter. To me, the one thing that is trying to drive a wedge between me and others is attitude and behaviors.
Respect given, treatment of others, kindness, work ethic, general approach to life. There is not a day that goes by when I do not think to myself, or even say out loud, “what is wrong with people?”
I know it sounds judgmental, and I suppose it is, but it comes out of pure frustration. The things an increasing number of people say and do, is, in my opinion, disgusting, and getting worse. The worst part is that the behaviors and attitudes I feel this way about are choices they make, things they have the power to do differently. They are the only ones who have the power to change their own attitude and behavior and they are choosing not to. For whatever reason.
The attitudes and associated behaviors I am talking about range from minor to severe, but all seem to be increasing and leading to the divide we are experiencing. Or at least the one I seem to be struggling with. People who cannot take their grocery cart back to the corral and just leave it floating around the parking lot for someone else to take care of. People who do not clean up after their pets in public spaces. People who leave trash anywhere except where it belongs. People who leave masks, cigarette butts, chewed gum, or used tissues for someone else to clean up. People who attack others online. People who deface others’ property, political yard signs included. People who do not believe you should work for what you want. People who abuse our systems that are in place to assist and protect those who really need it. I could go on with the disgusting behaviors.
These things are disrespectful, rude, lacking in common sense, ugly, not community-minded, and selfish.
Why am I struggling to overlook these things and learn who a person is beyond this attitude and behavior? Are some children no longer being taught respect for others, their environment and themselves? Am I just old fashioned to expect such things?
I saw a post on a friend’s social media that said #amyconeybarrettsucks. I do not comment on many posts that are political in nature, but I did that day. It does not matter how you feel about someone’s politics, saying some, as a whole, “sucks” is simply not appropriate. To encompass her entire being with that one word is terribly immature and rude. In addition to being a Supreme Court Justice, she is also a mother, a wife, a daughter, and many other things. I am certain anyone could find at least one area in which she does not, “suck,” even if you think she will as a Justice. But then is it hypocritical of me to let these observed attitude and behavior problems impact how I feel about others? Probably. The only justification I can rationalize for it is that these things I am talking about are more than actions. They represent a person’s entire approach to life. Lack of concern for others. Lack of care for property that is not theirs. Lack of common sense and common courtesy. Lack of personal responsibility.
I realize I do things that irritate others and that not everyone likes me. But at the core I believe I am a good person (thank you mom and dad) and make mostly good decisions (or at least learned from poor decisions I do make). What I am talking about today makes me question whether these people are, at their core, good people with good intentions who care about others and society.
To me, the divide is not about politics or social status. It is about attitude and choices people make. The wedge is growing, the divide is getting larger, and I do not know what to do about it. Except hold people accountable when I am able and display the attitude I want to see in others.
And for those who are still respectful, kind, good human beings, thank you. I notice.